The Orange Rhino Challenge

Isn't it funny how just when you need something, you get it? I have been feeling like quite the sub-par parent lately. I'm in my last semester of school and taking my marketing capstone class and intermediate accounting, both of which require hours of sitting in front of the computer or with my nose in my schoolbook every day. William has really stepped up with taking on most of the cooking, a hefty share of the cleaning, and taking care of the kids while I work on homework. He is really amazing. However, it's left me feeling even worse about my abilities as a parent than ever.

I am not an even-tempered person. I get angry. I lose my cool. I yell at my kids when they are bad. I yell at my kids when they are being kids. I spank little bottoms when things get to that point. Brenden and Brielle are both sponges right now. The first three years of a child's life are critical for learning everything, including social/emotional behaviors. What am I teaching my kids? That it's okay to lose it when you're angry? Clearly Brenden has already learned that from me. He screams back, throws things, and hits me. And these aren't even his tantrums!! Brielle is starting to hit Brenden when she gets mad at him; no doubt she has learned this from him, but I feel that we need to correct this behavior before it gets worse.

So that brings me back to finding what you need just when you need it. I was browsing Pinterest for Valentine's gifts for teachers (which reminds me, I still need to do....) and came across an awesome blog called Happy Home Fairy with a lot of great ideas. I noticed there was a button on the side saying that the blog was a finalist in the 2013 Parents Blog Awards for the "Most Likely to Make Like as CHO* Easier." CHO meaning, Chief Household Officer. Cute. Normally, I'd ignore that, but I was drawn in. *Click*

Looking at the other blogs I saw one titled The Orange Rhino Challenge under the category of "Most Likely to Help You Achieve a Personal Goal." Again, *click*

This mom realized that she yelled a lot. Too much. She committed to no yelling at her kids (I think the husband is fair game!) for 365 days. If she yells, she starts over at Day 1. If she goes into a "raging scream" (oh yeah, been there more times than you'd believe) she's set back to Day -2. Woah. That's a serious challenge. My initial thought was, "nuh uh, no way, not with my two." I went to the beginning and saw that for the first couple of weeks she started over a lot. That was encouraging. After searching the blog a little more I found the most appropriate post ever. To say it brought a tear to my eye would be an understatement. I spent a good ten minutes crying after reading it because it resonated with me so much. I realized that to have a more positive relationship with Brenden I've got to be compassionate towards his needs, which are more challenging than most kids. He's just like me and therefore I should be the one who knows best how to help him. So that's what I'm going to do.

I hereby pledge to take the challenge. She just wrapped up her 365 days on Wednesday, February 6. I found her blog 2 days later. I found it right when I should have-- when I was at a breaking point and once she was finished. Seeing another scream-happy mom go a whole year without let me know that I CAN TOO. 

I've already told a few super special friends of mine about this. They are working towards it too. I love that I'll have some of my best friends on board with me to help me when times get tough. Thank you ladies <3